Maladaptive or adaptive: What are adaptive behaviors

All behaviors make sense, right?

I have heard a varied set of responses to this over my years therapy. And some have been very lively in response.

However, we take our own ego and judgment out of the way and it gets clearer. The behavior is a response, an aversion to pain and/or a step to pleasure. And it worked, until it didn’t. Even as we continue to grow and develop, we can be blind to how our behaviors have become maladaptive. So what are adaptive behaviors?

For example, and probably my favorite example, people pleasing. It worked at a time for our safety (personal and emotional) along with helping to create a calm environment. So we reinforced what worked and grew up to be pleasing.

And then the wall — the dissatisfaction that our needs aren’t met. The stuck point in relationships. The feeling of being disingenuous with ourselves.

What worked, worked until it didn’t. And this is where the alchemy of personal ownership and insight comes in.

The examples are many and would require a longer blog. The take away is encouraging ourselves to take a step back and listen to the actor, not respond to the actions.

For more information or to start your journey, please reach out.